They broke in my house without a sound

Took whatever wasn't nailed down

Police said, what you need is a few more locks

It's just a joke, a game they play

Wait a month till the insurance pays

Then steal the next TV fresh out of the box

Everybody's Stealing (bits and pieces)

Everybody's Stealing (bits and pieces)

Everybody's Stealing bits and pieces of me

Everybody's Stealing (bits and pieces)

Everybody's Stealing (Bits and pieces)

Everybody's Stealing bits and pieces of me

Up a dark alley, feared for my life

Couple of chancers with a cosh and a knife

Couple of crackheads only looking for cash

Said, kneel down here, old man, will yer

Just kneel down and we won't have to kill yer

Don't shout out and don't do anything rash

The taxman takes his good old chunk

The landlord the same for this pile of junk

And I pay the council and then they pay the bizzies

But the cops can't catch a bleedin' cold

And all the excuses are getting old

My dog's the only one I can trust – or is he?

Had an idea once upon a time

Told my friend, he thought it was fine

He told his friend and his friend liked it too

Then his friend took it to his second cousin

Who makes these things by the umpteen dozen

That's when I realized, brother, you've been screwed

Everybody's Stealing (bits and pieces)

Everybody's Stealing (bits and pieces)

Everybody's Stealing bits and pieces of me

But the woman I love

Well bless her soul

At least she only stole my virginity

(That's what I told her)