I'm a farmer in a garden
Growing peaches in the name of Jesus
I'm a friend to the plants
and the planet and the animal world
But something's eating me up
Cuz something's eating my peaches
I'm a good-hearted man
And I want to believe
That there's enough peaches to share
Between me and the squirrels

As time goes by
I can see I've got a bit of a task
There's a bite in every ripe one
My peaches just ain't gonna last
I prayed to the Lord, help me
to end this racket
The Lord said, “a squirrel
is just a rat in a rabbit's jacket
So do what you need to do
And I'll forgive you”

A squirrel is a two timing no good cruel double crosser
They look real cute
but you know who be stealing your food
They're slick, they're quick
And they pick you the best ones
We'd probably get a long
if they saved me some
And it breaks my heart
To do what I'm'a'gonna do

Now I am a farmer in a kitchen
inviting friends over for dinner
I invited the squirrel to come in
Because I had a surprise
I'd had enough of the fuss
Enough of the fighting
The game is over
Now this was do or die
So I pulled out a knife
And I served him…
A slice of pie